Hapyy birthday to me. one more year and i am half a century old. wow i am old. only yesterday all my basic needs was tended to by my parents. not that i yearn for those days. sometimes it would be nice to have someone that tended to allmyneeds. sometimes it would be nice to be considered high mainatnace by the ones around me and have them think enough of me not to have to be cold shouldered into buying me a birthday card for my birthday (what yours dont change dates yearly???) and even pick up the phone and call and say happy birthday mom.
i dont know hwat garys problem is. he is satisified giving me second hand rings (at least they did not belong to former fiances of his life) and i am not sure but i think that card he says he ran out and bought yesterday morning cuz i told him he was a cad for not even at least buying me a card, looks very familiar. thats what i get for not scrapbooking anymore. why he thought i should give him sheris payment for the concert tickets is beyond me. he paid for our portion, cuz i was low on money at the time Thank God he could, but i did not feel like i owed him 120 to buy beer with. in the long run cost me more than that in concert shirts and cds for every one.
Thank God for Sheri. she may not realize it but i appreciated her little gifts. i wont admit that i just bought that same cd for myself a month ago. it was a present for me when i bought the titan so i could infuse it with a little estrogen. fact is i will put it back so when i wear out this current copy i have i will put in that one. sheryle crow, how her tunes and melodies have gotten me thru many times in my life
i wish thta my family could learn from her. i would have been tickled pink if gary had just purchased gift cards to various stores, like hobby lobby which is one store down from the shop he works at. hell he did not even have to go across the street to the mall or target. no need to waste that much gas buying a token for me for my birthday. thanks again dear. i told you you bought me that car. gave you an easy out, but that really did not mean i did not expect something more. you say you you are going to tent my windows or put on the mud flaps but we both know you have things you want me to buy you for your truck cuz you never make enough money. so the things i want for my car is way down on the list of things to expectin fact forget the mud flasp i can at least get the windows tinted without help fromyou. the name of that word is self empowerment.
i really enjoyed my birthday this year though. i dont expect anything any better from him and callie of course let me down. she had a couple of years where i have actually respected and appreciated her, but she is back into old patterns and frankly i dont have time for her dramas. too bad the kids are sucked into it. i am walking around with her money for something she swaid she did not have to get paid for. not a big deal. i decided to just push the envelop and tell her that i dont have time in my own busy life to drive that far and let her struggle and wiggle to figure out how to get hold of the moeny. maybe it did bother her that geffre got my precious little mitzibishi. but he was in my site at the time. the car was too small for her and he at least makes semblance of keeping it up. she would not have been able to do this. i dont care what she says about not babysitting, she is lucky to be a stay at home mom, but at least her house could be cleaner and the kids could be involved in a few more outdoor activiites like save the moeny from a pack of cigerettes and take them to the pool for the day. take them to the library and let the librians read to them and entertain and fule imaginations for an hour once a week. there are alot of free things you can do in this life with kds. i do believe i managed to take the kids out at least once a week to do something even with me working and sometimes helping other family members thru thier difficult times. like step dad getting chemo for his cancer ect.
well i can vent as much as i want and it would do n9otthing more than be whining and complaining
i had a great brithday in the long run. it was cool and i can say i spent my birthday on a hill in a thunderstorm. the way i felt about it if iwas going to be hit by lightning better to be there there and have the reputation of being killed by lighting while watching a zz top concert than killed by some malignant disease that eats away at my body or some car wreck that would leave me to rot away and cause my family anguish of lingering life.
anyway thats the birthday. sheri bought our dinner for all of hs at mac grill and i feel bad she spent so much money. but i appreciated it.
